When Pain Outbursts
I’m in my bedroom and everything seems so dull, I‘m in the middle of taking out all my tears from my eyes. I am currently cursing and cussing this pain that I cannot bear anymore. This life is nowhere to lead but a miserable one….
That is what I’m doing when I hear a strange voice and I can’t locate its whereabouts.
“Why do you hate me that much? Why do you always wants to get rid of me? You despise me that much that you don’t want me to exists in your life. Most of all, you are excellent in denying me. You should not do that. It will just make things worse.” The voice agitatedly rants at me. I can’t recognize what to feel because I don’t know why out of nowhere someone is telling me these things without knowing me well.
“You don’t understand.” I told him with my rough voice.
“No. You don’t understand.” The voice corrected me. Is this what-do-I-call-this- thing crazy?
“Oh, can you please stop now. You don’t know that much. You don’t know how I feel. It’s easy for you to tell that.”
“You are wrong. I know what I am talking about. I know how you feel because I am what you feel. I am Pain.”
“Stop fooling me.” I said to this crazy thing angrily. At this moment, I still can’t believe that I am talking to someone I don’t see.
“You are the one who should stop fooling yourself. You, human beings are too selfish. You are always blaming me because when you are in a stab of a knife scenario. You hate because you don’t want to experience me anymore. But, sad to say, I demand to be felt and you should thank me for that.” Pain retorted.
“Are you on drugs? If you are pain, then damn you for demanding to be felt. You are the one who is selfish.”
“See, you really can’t comprehend things because you are only focus on what you feel. Don’t you know that it is an agony for me to see you suffering, but I need to. I want you to learn. You needed to be strong and stand for yourself. Can’t you see that? I LOVE YOU THAT MUCH THAT I WANTED YOU TO GROW.”